Five Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas for Cruise Lovers

Wondering what to get your cruise loving spouse or partner or crush or yourself (#loveyoself) for Valentine’s Day?  Here are five Valentine’s Day gift ideas for the cruise lover in your life.

1. Chocolate…

…on a cruise ship!

Sure, you could toss a box of heart-shaped Godiva’s into your shopping cart and call it good.  But trust me, your girlfriend knows how close the candy isle is to the beer isle and this gift will read as: minimal effort.  Besides, she’s a cruise lover and the only thing a cruise lover really wants for Valentine’s (or any holiday, really) is…a cruise!  Book her on a Carnival cruise where she can indulge in the best chocolate dessert at sea:

2. Drinks and a show…

…on a cruise ship!

Drinks and a show would make the perfect gift for your Broadway-loving boyfriend.  But when you check the prices for the traveling production of Kinky Boots, you think to yourself, “I could book a 7-night cruise for that!”  Bingo!  Book him on the Norwegian Encore where you can enjoy Kinky Boots AND unlimited drinks for free (I mean you had to pay for the cruise, but let’s not split hairs here)!

3. Flowers…

…on a cruise ship!

It took me a year of marriage before I finally confessed to Mr. Cruise that I hated it when he bought me flowers.  He would bring them in, plop them on the counter wrapped in cellophane, and check off the “did you do something romantic for her this week” box on the checklist he cut out of GQ. 

Meanwhile, I had to remove the flowers from the cellophane, find and fill a vase, arrange the flowers, and clean up the mess left behind.  Then a week later, gazing over breakfast at something akin to Slimer from Ghostbusters, unrecognizable from the carnations they used to be, I sighed and disposed of them in the compost bin before scrubbing the vase and contemplating “accidentally” breaking it before returning it to the cupboard.

A hard truth: Most women (and everyone really) love flowers, but we hate taking care of them.  So instead of buying your Valentine flowers, book him or her on a Holland America cruise!  Why HAL?  Because the line is known for having gorgeous fresh flowers throughout their ships. 

4. Lingerie…

…on a cruise ship!

Confession: I had to Google how to spell lansurae, make that “lingerie.” 

You should also know that while it may have felt like a sacrifice at the time (when you – red-faced and shaking – asked the hot sales associate, “what size do you think my wife would wear in this,” followed by, “she’s about yay tall and yay wide”), that négligée you picked out at Victoria’s Secret was a gift for you, not your wife.  If you want to get her loungewear she’ll actually enjoy, get her one of these:

Only available on a Disney Cruise! 

5. A puppy…

…on a cruise ship

Awww, a puppy!  Everyone loves a puppy!  But before you hit the dollar store for a basket and a bow, think about who’s going to walk it and train it and clean up after it.  Spoiler alert, YOU ARE.  And who’s going to fill in for you when you cruise?  Solution?

Book your Valentine on a Royal Caribbean cruise, where cabin stewards make the BEST towel animals! 

In Conclusion

So there you have it, five Valentine’s Day gift ideas for your cruise lover.  But why not get them all – five cruises on five different cruise lines!  Or make it seven, we don’t want to leave out Princess and Celebrity! You’ll make your Valentine so happy and you might just get a little gift in return:

And with that…

Class Dismissed.

Homework (10 points): Before you book those 5 cruises, review my articles, “How Do I Get The Best Deal On A Cruise” and “20 Pro Tips To Save Money On A Cruise Ship.”

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