*DISCLAIMER*
I USE HUMOR HERE AS I USE IT IN THE REST OF MY LIFE, AS A WAY TO COPE WITH DIFFICULT TIMES. I UNDERSTAND THE SERIOUSNESS OF COVID-19 AND ENCOURAGE EVERYONE TO FOLLOW THE RECOMMENDATIONS OF EXPERTS AND NATIONAL AND LOCAL LEADERS. MY HEART GOES OUT TO EVERYONE AFFECTED AND I WISH ALL MY CRUISE FRIENDS SUPPORT, ECONOMIC SECURITY, AND GOOD HEALTH.
Try your hands at cooking some of your favorite cruise line foods. Or better yet, make your minions do it!
Go here for the recipe and detailed instructions for Carnival’s famous melting chocolate cake. I also recommend Princess’s fettuccine alfredo, Holland America’s bread and butter pudding, NCL’s macadamia nut hummus with roasted pineapple relish, Celebrity’s sangria recipe, and these Royal Caribbean drink recipes. You can also find many other Holland America recipes, including the famous Dutch pea soup served on Alaska sailings, in this cookbook available on Amazon (the soup is on page 53):
If you have a future cruise booked, spend hours planning what you’ll eat and drink each day by perusing cruise line food and beverage menus. You can find many recent sample menus here:
Go back to #1 or proceed to #3 if you’re ravenous after reading them.
This one’s a three-fer. You can eat like you’re on a cruise, work on your Covid 19 (pounds), AND support local restaurants struggling to stay in business during these difficult times. Order daily take-out from your favorite neighborhood restaurants for delivery or grab-and-go. Replate your meal on cruise ship china and make your husband serve it to you while engaging in small talk, “is this your first global pandemic, ma’am?”
Since a typical 7 night cruise features two “formal nights,” bust out your evening gown or tux twice a week for a fancy dinner of canned beans or shelf stable mac ‘n cheese.
Learn the art of folding your favorite cruise ship towel animals. There are many instructional videos on youtube or purchase this book available on Amazon:
Then stage them to tickle and delight (or traumatize) your family:
Dumbo’s hoarding all the toilet paper! In all fairness though, elephants need a lot.
It’s easy to lose track of the days on a cruise – every day feels like the weekend! Holland America fans will recognize the ingenious day-of-the-week floor mats in all ship elevators. After all, HAL caters to an older clientele and they don’t want anyone missing their pricey spa treatment!
The days can also begin to blend together while you’re sheltering in place and you risk missing the one thing on your calendar, your regular Sunday call with your mom (sorry, mom!). I couldn’t find any floor mats to purchase for home use, but I did find these cute day-of-the-week kitchen towels that can serve a similar function:
This is one way my life hasn’t changed at all since the “stay at home” order came to Seattle.
Set up a “washy, washy” station at your front door and the entrance to your kitchen. Spray the hands of your children while singing, “washy washy, happy happy” and see how many times it takes them to say, “mom/dad, you’re so annoying!” The record is once (set by yours truly).
If you can’t find hand sanitizer available for purchase, you can make your own and pour it into inexpensive spray bottles available on Amazon.
You may not think a global pandemic is the appropriate time to play a prank on your friends and family, but I say it’s the perfect time! Emotions are high and brain capacity limited as many of us are juggling working from home (or essential work outside the home), homeschooling, and other responsibilities. I posted the first part of this video to all my social media accounts with the caption: “enjoying my first sea day. So thankful my cruise wasn’t canceled!”
I received many confused and outraged responses. So fun!
To recreate it for your own friends, search for a photo of a porthole, print it and cut out the middle, tape it to your computer screen over footage of moving ocean, and…viola!
Bust out the collection of cassette tapes from your youth and wonder aloud, “since when is Phil Collins considered an oldie???”
You can also post to cruise related Facebook groups this question: “my cruise is scheduled for [insert date]. Will it be canceled?” Trust me, random people on the internet WILL have the definitive answer!
Hosted trivia games, focused on a variety of topics, are a popular cruise activity. While sheltering in place, host a virtual cruise-themed trivia night for your friends and family. Be sure to only invite those who know nothing about cruising though (wait, why are you friends with them exactly?), so you’ll be guaranteed the grand prize:
For the most realistic effect, I included a small brown piece of soap that looked deceptively like poop.
And don’t forget to hog yourself a prime lounger!
If you feel comfortable and have the resources to do so, book a cruise for a much later date (don’t ask me for a date – remember that thing I said about random people on the internet?) and spend your time planning. Because planning a cruise is almost as much fun as being on a cruise. Almost. And with that…
Class Dismissed.
Optional homework: post to the comments other fun ideas to occupy cruise lovers while sheltering in place at home. And don’t forget to subscribe to the blog (scroll up to the top right if on a computer or keep scrolling down if on a mobile device) and follow Prof. Cruise on social media:
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